You Are Enough

For many years I struggled with the question of, am I good enough, am I worthy, does anyone care, does anyone like me? And it held me back from bringing out my gifts and talents for many years, it ruined relationships, and self-doubt kept me from taking opportunities. I now know why that happened and I have been able to reverse it so that now I have a healthy sense of worth, and out of that comes the best of me, not perfect and not all the time, because just like you I am human.

And I discovered the ingredient that was missing was called Personal Power.

This is not power over others, this is power over yourself. Your thoughts, feelings, choices, decisions, and actions. It is the ability to say; "You know what?, I am doing okay. I am teachable, I am humble. I am still on a journey of imperfection and constantly learning as I go, but I am good enough."

And you know what? The person that you have to be good enough for first is YOU.

We all tend to look for things from other people that we are not giving ourselves. We want other people to like us, to love us, to accept us, but we have not arrived there yet ourselves.

So, what I want to do this month is to be as vulnerable and open as I can to help you to remove self-doubt, to get clear once and for all, to have awareness around the fact that you have everything within you and around you to get ahead in life.

Whatever you have done, what has been said to you, and the experiences that you have been involved in, you have made them mean things about yourself that has eroded away your sense of self-belief, self-confidence, and self-worth. And, in a lot of cases, it stagnates and stops you from being who you need to be, so that you can do the things you need to do, to have the results that you want to have.

For many years, people have called me The People Builder. Yes, I love working with others but let me tell you, for many of those years I did not love me. I was always putting on this false facade so that you would like me and accept me, so that I would feel worthy through my abilities and skills, but it never worked. It wasn't until I got some support, some help to help me to get the awareness of these things and look at them through a different lens, that things changed for the better. Only after reframing what I was seeing through the lens of my own experience, inner dialogue and doubt, was I able to recognise and have the awareness that I needed, that these things were no longer serving me.

You know those three universal fears that I talk about all the time, that every single human being, (yes you too) operates out of: the fear of not belonging, the fear of not being enough, and the fear of not being loved. No longer do they need to rule your life.

You can get to a point where you stop looking for approval externally because you are finally getting it from yourself. And that doesn't mean that you never care what other people think, but their approval is a byproduct and is just validation of what you already know about yourself. Then, in a confident way, not an arrogant way, You can say, "Hey, this is me. This is what I can bring. This is who I am."

So, I want to help you to start a journey to strengthen and rebuild your identity, by developing your Personal Power. To do that, you are going to need to change some old thinking and let go of some things that are holding you back. Now I realise you might not even know they are holding you back, but you think they are keeping you safe, but they're not.

You are going to need to shift some unhealthy thinking around yourself, change some limiting beliefs, and reprogram your inner dialogue. You know, that pesky voice inside your head that is probably even talking to you right now as you are listening to me saying, "turn that off. This guy's got no idea what he's talking about. He does not know me. He does not know us."

And the only reason that voice is there is because it knows that if you listen to this and then come on this journey with me you will strengthen your personal power and then make some decisions that might be a little bit scary because they are outside your current frame of reference, your comfort zone, and they might even put you in a position that could trigger one of those fears.

But let me tell you friend that this is what you need right now.

I work with people all across the planet and it doesn't matter what colour, gender, race, or ethnic background. None of those labels matter at all because the human condition is the same for every single one of us. We were created to be able to operate in a certain way, and what you think about yourself matters more than anybody else.

I love what Eleanor Roosevelt said. She said, what other people think of you is none of your business. And she went on to say that no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

So, what is this thing called Personal Power?

As I said, it is not a power over others, it is a power over yourself. It is a power that says, you know what? I've got everything within me and around me to get what I want in life. I do no longer need external approval to validate who I am. I can be vulnerable and I can be not okay, and that's okay. I can advocate for myself in a healthy way. Instead of saying yes all the time to other people whose approval I'm trying to get at the detriment of my own priorities, I can so no more often.

It usually takes a defining moment that flicks a switch and moves you make a decision to work on this. Hopefully at some point you will get to the point where I was, where enough was enough.

It was exhausting trying to be who I thought everyone else wanted me to be and I found out that the expectations that I was putting on myself were much higher than the expectations that other people had of me.

I used to think for me to not get rejected, I had to do all these things.

For me to be good enough to belong, to be liked, to be loved, I had to prove myself. No, I just had to be me, because when I was trying to do all those other things, I created someone who wasn't the true me, and that was not congruent. And not only did it make me feel terrible and exhausted, it didn't bring out everything that I had to give those other people.

So, what I feared actually came upon me. People rejected me because I was going on like a crazy person. Trying to be someone that I wasn't. I know right now that there are people nodding their heads thinking, yeah, this is me, Grant. This is my story too. Well, let me tell you, friend, that I am here to help and have made it my life's mission.

I'm just about to turn 64 so I have still got a few years left, and I am going to make sure that I help as many people as I can to find this wonderful thing called Personal Power. Of all the competencies that I deal with in the emotional intelligence realm, this is the foundation. This is number one and it affects all the others.

So, connect with me however you are receiving this, and let me know that you want to come on this journey, and I am going to commit to you to give you step by step, incremental changes that you can make so that you realise:

YOU are enough. YOU do belong, and YOU are loved.

I'll see you then.