Becoming a Masterful Communicator

SUMMARY

Do you sometimes have people at work who don’t understand you? They might give you looks as if they can see your lips moving, but they’re not picking up what you’re putting down. Or maybe they nod their heads but still walk away then fail to achieve the results you want. This can be very frustrating for you as a leader, and something you might not realise is that it’s also frustrating for them. So, this week, let’s talk about how you can get rid of all that confusion.

Hi, this is Grant Herbert, leadership and sustainable performance coach, and today let’s continue our conversation about building great relationships within your team by helping you become a masterful communicator.

So, what does it mean to be a masterful communicator? I’m not talking about getting up on stages or being an orator. It’s great if you reach that point, but being masterful is about communicating with others—individually or collectively in your team—no matter the size of your organisation. It’s about doing so confidently and ensuring your message is well received. It’s about shedding those bad habits, like thinking communication happened just because you said something. It’s about setting things up in your favour, so there’s less confusion, and everyone knows with clarity where you’re headed together. Great communication is a key element in reducing the conflict and stress that you, your team, and your organisation may be experiencing.

Let’s look at three key areas that will help you become a masterful communicator.

The first area is becoming an active listener.

The second area is understanding the communication process.

The third area I wanted to emphasise as your takeaway is celebrating differences in how people communicate.

That’s all from me for this week. Join me next week as we continue our conversation on building great relationships by helping you leverage conflict for stronger teamwork. I’ll see you then.

TRANSCRIPT

Do you sometimes have people at work who don’t understand you? They might give you looks as if they can see your lips moving, but they’re not picking up what you’re putting down. Or maybe they nod their heads but still walk away then fail to achieve the results you want. This can be very frustrating for you as a leader, and something you might not realise is that it’s also frustrating for them. So, this week, let’s talk about how you can get rid of all that confusion. 

Hi, this is Grant Herbert, leadership and sustainable performance coach, and today let’s continue our conversation about building great relationships within your team by helping you become a masterful communicator.  

Last week, we talked about the four pillars of great teamwork and building strong relationships, which are vital to your success as a leader. AI is excellent, but human-to-human relationships are key. We talked about collaboration, handling change, navigating conflict, and that fourth pillar—communication. This week, let’s go deeper into communication because it’s a common denominator that also challenges all the other pillars. 

So, what does it mean to be a masterful communicator? I'm not talking about getting up on stages or being an orator. It's great if you reach that point, but being masterful is about communicating with others—individually or collectively in your team—no matter the size of your organisation. It's about doing so confidently and ensuring your message is well received. It's about shedding those bad habits, like thinking communication happened just because you said something. It's about setting things up in your favour, so there's less confusion, and everyone knows with clarity where you're headed together. Great communication is a key element in reducing the conflict and stress that you, your team, and your organisation may be experiencing. 

Let's look at three key areas that will help you become a masterful communicator. 

Before diving into those areas, remember that the foundation of all this lies in your identity. It all starts with your personal leadership because how you feel about yourself will shape your communication with others. With that as your foundation, these three areas will give you the right skill set to communicate effectively with anyone on your team. 

The first area is becoming an active listener.  

Listening is a key component of communication. In fact, the very definition of communication emphasises listening actively and openly, followed by sending concise, clear, and credible messages. It all starts with listening. 

Initially, I used to think that communication started with me saying something. However, listening enables you to understand what to say and how to say it, depending on who your audience is. Learning to actively listen means fully engaging and genuinely wanting to understand what's being shared. It involves reading individuals and understanding not just what's being said but also what isn't. 

That’s the essence of being a listener—an essential quality in becoming a masterful communicator. 

The second area is understanding the communication process.  

Many people assume that communication has taken place when, in reality, it hasn’t. As the line from Cool Hand Lukegoes, “What we have here is a failure to communicate.”, sometimes people think communication has occurred based on the responses they receive, but human beings have unique styles, identities, and beliefs that can lead to misinterpretations.  

Let's examine the communication process to understand why confusion sometimes arises when communication isn't handled well. 

Communication involves a sender and a receiver. For simplicity, let's focus on a one-on-one interaction. 

What happens is the sender encodes the message they want to communicate, filtering it through their own lens and communication style. They then send this message out, which can be delivered through various mediums—speaking, email, text, and even more creative methods like carrier pigeons or smoke signals. However, this message has to travel through a lot of "noise"—distractions, daily stresses, the receiver's own uncertainties, lack of self-belief and so forth. In marketing, this is known as “marketing noise,” where messages compete with other advertisements. The same thing happens daily in communication within your team. 

When the message reaches the receiver, they decode it based on their own filters. This interpretation could be influenced by beliefs, emotions, or even biases, which may lead them to interpret the message differently than intended. When they respond, this response may not align with what you expected. Now, the receiver becomes the sender, encoding their response and sending it back through their own filters, and the cycle continues. You then decode their response, and this pattern can repeat indefinitely, creating numerous opportunities for miscommunication. 

This is why active listening is essential. It’s important to recognise that the medium you choose for communication may not always be the best one for the other person. In the corporate world, I often see excessive use of emails. People think, "That's easy; I'll just send an email.” However, emails land in inboxes that often act as endless to-do lists that never seem to clear. For many people, these messages are easily missed. Sometimes, picking up the phone may be a more effective approach. 

The third area I wanted to emphasise as your takeaway is celebrating differences in how people communicate.  

For example, I’m a very visual person. If you want me to understand something, paint me a picture rather than overwhelming me with words, PowerPoint slides, and bullet points. But you might be thinking, “I prefer the dot points and text to understand something.” So, to understand you better, I need to actively listen and look for cues in how you communicate. Although I can’t cover it all in this short video, I consider what people show me—their level of certainty, confidence, decision-making style, whether they’re kinesthetic and need to feel things or if they’re more analytical and fact-driven. 

Over time, I work to understand these individual preferences, and if I don't understand, I ask. For example, I might ask, "Would you prefer I give you a lot of information in words, or would you rather I draw a picture?" Understanding the person you're communicating with will help you avoid sending a message they might interpret differently than you intended. Communicating in the way they need, by giving them what they require, ultimately helps you achieve what you want. That's the key to becoming a masterful communicator. 

This applies not only to individuals but also to groups. Sometimes, you need to understand the group's collective style and communicate in a way that covers different preferences. In a group setting, this might mean following up with individual communication in another medium to ensure everyone has the clarity they need. Actively listening, reflecting, and confirming your understanding with them are essential steps. All these practices help you, as a communicator and leader, minimise confusion, enabling you and your team to collaborate with healthy conflict and make necessary changes within your organisation. 

Masterful communication as a leader is vital to creating an environment where a team can work cohesively and build strong relationships.  

That's all from me for this week. Join me next week as we continue our conversation on building great relationships by helping you leverage conflict for stronger teamwork. I’ll see you then.